Ok here it is
First off i need to apologize to Petra about my cruel and hurtful words, I felt my character was being attacked even though it may have needed and I responded the way I normally do.
The other problem here is motivation has changed. Motivation is the single most important factor in film and literature, and is also a major factor in life. The relationships that have been built with each of you has been motivated by Rockfish, however, in every group of friends change shifts in role, and events dramatically reshape a group a dynamic. Through both of these I no longer have a niche or a motivation. This summer our group experienced a shift, I never found a new niche at Rockfish I wasn't very useful, and was incredibly uncomfortable. Thus my motivation has changed, I am no longer motivated by a love of Rockfish, it is no longer a home, or a place of comfort and will likely never be again. This has a profound impact on all of you, as my relationships and conversations with you guys always rooted in "last summer" and "next summer" I will no be there this summer. At this point I don't think I have any desire to attend reunion even if I could. Thus I will likely dimish further from this blog because I don't feel I have anything to add to you. I don't fit into the puzzle. This summer I will be here at Junaluska working as a Sound Technician, and will be directing videography, I suppose it would be similar to Jorge's job, but many or our videos will be scripted peices to accompany the program.
I'm sorry if I've hurt you guys.
I will always Love you guys, but I'm not sure how much longer our paths will be together
Peace
Jordan Cauley
posted by JtotheSstaff @ 12:29 AM
1 Comments:
While it may be true that you've had motivations based around Rockfish itself, there is ALWAYS the undeniable bond between us as brothers and sisters in Christ. While we often dont let that dominate our relationships and let other motives (like selfishness for attention, attraction, or just working at the same place) take the front seat, the one thing that will always be there is the love of Christ that bonds us. Jordan, my friendship with you has never been based on what was going on at Rockfish, but, whether i've let you know this or not, its been based on how you are doing with the Lord. My first, deepest, and truest concern for you, and everyone on this blog, is simply how you are really doing in your relationship with God. You not coming to camp this summer (heck theres a good chance i wont be there either) or not enjoying this past summer will not change the most important thing between us: brotherhood.
Dont feel like you have to "phase out" or whatever. Yeah, there'll be some natural separation (which i know i'll experience, too, if i dont work and everyone else does), but thats not what brotherhood and sisterhood is about. We're not friends, we're family. And even when you move away from your family, there are some family ties that simply never change. In short, even though we may not have kept up since camp and even though we probably wont be talking a ton, I will ALWAYS want to know how you're doing and see you grow in the Lord. So dont quit talking to us and try and post on here every now and then to let us know how you're doing.
The same goes for every one of you--i always want to hear from you and always want to know how you are really doing. Since it is Christ that binds our hearts together, my heart's desire is to know that your bond with Christ is secure--including you Jordan Cauley.
Sorry this is long....but i think all of us would say the same thing.
Love,
Luke
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